My last visit with Jennifer Ryan (my daughter’s mother-in-law) was September 6, 2019 and it left me shaken and sad.

 

Lament for Jen o’fer

She was …….she was….. she ain’t anymore what she was

Jen o’ fer (as they say in merry tea sodden ole England) Jen o fer

I lament for who you were and are no more.

She was …….she was….. she ain’t anymore what she was ….

Oh Jen o fer

 

To the manor born you were you were

Wisteria blooming on old stone hedges

Of course…a coat of arms

A family dictum in Latin

Was it truth before beauty? some such

Horses

too many barking dogs

Probably fleas and definitely hairballs.

 

Ah the pleasures of country life

Daddy’s doing the Nanny

Mommy’s plotting her escape

….leaving her children behind

 For Jennifer no mommy just the nanny

No goodbyes …not sentimental those British.

 

Cruel unhealed wounds

Made you ruthlessly honest

No dissembling

No fear of bad manners

But a definite need for strong drink.

 

AH Jen o fer

I lament for who you were

with all your cranky meanness towards me

had a soft spot in my heart for you

Admired your walk a way adventurous spirit,

your knowledge of music and musical men.. remarkable

I shuttered at your

aptitude for words …spitting your opinions loud

unafraid of your thoughts. Unapologetic.

 

Seeing you today so diminished has broken my reserve against feeling my love  : the soul flame still burns in your enfeebled shell almost out / your eyes rheumy /your body turned on itself/ your voice silenced.

The old cat curls next to you warming on your dying cinders. He will not leave you.

Where have you gone?  I miss you.

She was …….she was….. she ain’t anymore what she was

I lament for who you were and are no more.